Sunday, July 31, 2011

Horrifying House Guest...



The last few days have been dark and dirty. I was enjoying my time, reveling in the good news of the hair show when all of a sudden this god awful visitor comes knocking at my door. I curiously peak out the window to see who it was when she barges in and announces she will be staying for 5 to 7 days. She's a real pain in the gut, let me tell you... I have to clean up after all her messes, she tags along to all my important business meetings and threatens to make my life more difficult for wearing light coloured slacks or shorts!

Well anyway, on a better note, despite my unruly tag-along... I had a great second day at the hair show! Goldwell is one of those fancy shmancy hair colour companies that I could never afford if I wasn't getting paid for it.

The show was short but sweet, and I managed to stay alive and look fabulous!


Us COOL heads are on our way to success!

I must now tend to my guest, the only thing she's good for is supplying me with chocolate cake. It's the least she can do!

OVER & OUT

Thursday, July 28, 2011

My HAIRitage

Thanks Nichole for that title.

Today was my first hair show day, a day of preparation. It was a long day, a bit tedious, a bit cold, and I was a bit hungry. What the heck am I complaining about tho?! I got paid $200 bucks to sit around and get my hair did! My day started with an overpriced coffee from the Aria coffee roast. If I wasn't so addicted to caffeine I would have let it go, especially since the woman in front of me spent $25.27 on a tiny bowl of leaves. After that tragedy I walked up to the convention center and saw a giant poster of the hair colour they had selected for me...


COOL, I thought...

My fabulous hair guru,  John C. Simpson , worked his magic on me... Fabulously!


I went from a TLC wannabe...

To a Mongolian warrior...




To a shining Korean pop star... all within the course of 6 or so hours!!





I just looooooooove the way hair looks and feels when professionally maintained. But I just  haaaaaaaaaate the fact that you have to go home, mess it all up, and then are expected to make it just as pretty the next day. Also, I'm not allowed to wash it until Sunday. So come Sunday, I may smell a bit.. But I'll still have a heart of gold!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Everyday I'm HAIRstlin'

Well I sure did have a productive day!

I woke up promptly at 8am, made myself pretty, had my cereal (cuz you know I gotta have it), and went to two hair model casting calls! The first was at The Wynn, and it seemed like a real WYNN... (sorry)... And then I went to the second casting.

BUT, not until I spent 5 hours wandering aimlessly about the strip, killing time in Starbucks, dancing to kpop, and almost falling asleep in the conference room hallway at the Aria having been the first to arrive at the second casting. Unfortunately, I looked like this...



But alls well that ends well, turns out they liked me and booked me for three days! That's $600 smackaroos!! All for enhancing my beauty! God Bless America.


Stay tuned for this seasons makeover special!

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Another Day, Another 3 Dollars

I woke up today with no intention of leaving my apartment, but something lead me outside...This something, a bird feeder, caused me to walk 30 minutes to the nearest CVS all the way down the strip. It was one of those moments that I really thought I needed a bird feeder so my cats could watch hummingbirds feed from the pleasure of their own balcony, and instead of walking away with my intended product, I end up with a pack of starbucks VIA ready brew coffee and BQ Corn nuts. BQ!!!


While browsing the aisles of CVS I thought about how triumphant it would be to buy a 6 pack of beer and hand it out to the many "Not Gonna Lie I Need A Beer" guys on the bridge walkways, I even went to look at prices. I then realised that it was like, 9 dollars to purchase any 6 pack of any kind of beer, and I quickly gave up on that idea. Besides, I don't even drink, I should like...throw a Bible at them, or...Whatever.

After purchasing my corn nuts I decided that today would be the day I would win big money on the slot machines so I got cash back in the grand total of 3 dollars. I walked to NY,NY...


Played "Theme From New York, New York" on my ipod and searched for the best looking slot I could find. I found my first slot, Buffalo Spirit. Now I KNEW my ancestors would help me out on this one.. I put in my dollar, played 20 lines, 1 credit per line, and *ding ding ding ding ding* I lost. Damn you ancient ones! I thought you had my back!! 

Since my people don't seem to care if I end up penniless, I decided to put my next dollar into China Moon. There was a very handsome Chinese computer graphic man I was SURE was flirting with me, so I gave him my dollar and away we went! He ended up forking over $1.57 knowing this was as far as he wanted to go, I cashed out. WOO HOO! I'm in the money!!! 

I was going to walk away happy when I spotted it.... Sitting all alone, amongst Old Money and Wolf Moon. The Monkees. They have their very own slot. Now I knew about this already, as my best friend had previously won on said slot. I knew, I just KNEW The Monkees wouldn't let me down. I put in my dollar and let fate grab the reigns. What's this? Daydream Believer plays every time the slot spins? This is too good to be true! What's that? Nothing won? Nothing at all?! I went through an entire dollar and NOTHING happened?! Don't they know the countless number of hours I have spent singing their songs, watching their television programming, and dressing like a 1960s boy?!??! Alright guys, this was just a fluke.. 2 more dollars would do the trick! *cheer up sleepy jeeeeeeeeeeean* CRAP!!!! I HATE YOU MONKEES!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE YOU AND YOUR SHINEY HAIR AND YOUR BOYISH GOOD LOOKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, in the end New York, New York took me for a ride, I walked away $3 poorer, but with the knowledge that just because you love a band and you happen to stumble upon ONE slot in an entire casino with them as the main theme, doesn't mean magic music fairy gods will come down and grant you winnings on it. Or... maybe it's just Peter Tork's fault? YEAH! That's it!!


                                                            (don't look at me like that...)

On another note... I decided I want THIS to be my new job:


Despite my Veganism, if I had the chance to feed these cats ponies, I would. So, that's it for now.. Another day in lovely Las Vegas has been spent. And another Elvis has been encountered. 


Ahh, the good life. 

Monday, July 25, 2011

Speaking Of Dead Grandmothers...

So I was on my way to the strip...


Down, somewhat lonely, desolation row...


When suddenly, a wild Grandma appears! (no photo, as it would be rude to photograph a wild grandma. they are known to bite). Actually I was on LV blvd after stopping by to see an old friend...

(^this one) Just past an Elvi,


Lie a sickened grandmother and two helpless Granddaughters. Obviously heat stroke had set in, and the helpless girls lie and watch helplessly. Being the stand up citizen I am I immediately located a "WATR WON DOH'LR" vender, and purchase WON WATR for WON DOH'LR. I run back to Grans and offer her the WATR free of charge, in hopes she will live to see another day. Granddaughter (one had vanished) thanked me kindly yet confusedly. And I walked away like this:


Knowing I had done the right thing.

On another note... (Not quite as heroic) I did have the privilege of spotting some typical Las Vegas Wildlife.

Exhibit A) Wild Parrot on Wild Pirate, stunk of rum, yet reeked of self satisfaction. (also, had some poopies on his shoulder)



Exhibit B) Wild Homeless Man, known to be honest, and thirsty.


Exhibit C) Wild Fountain Jumpers, like to maintain a nice cool, most likely stealing your wish.




Shortly after exploring I discovered that most of my skin had turned to strange liquid, with a high content  of sodium chloride. In other words, I was sweating my taco-loving butt off. So I raced home to be cooled off by luxury.

END.

Holy Jesus. What are these goddamn animals?

Hello all, I'm Sophia. I've had a blog or two in the past and I decided it was time again to ramble about my life to strangers who probably aren't reading this anyway *forever alone*.  I just recently moved to that ol' place of sin your grandma loves, yes.. Las Vegas. I've always wanted to live here,  I knew it was only a matter of time. I'm a n00b in this city, so I have lots to learn. So far I know it's hotter than walrus balls, and that's just not gonna change. Irrelevant. My intentions (tell your fathers) are good. I wish to give you all a peek at how I view life here in the LV.

So far the only thing I have to say is the obvious, people come here to escape reality. That's the beauty of living in Las Vegas, nothing is real. I walk down the street and there is a giant sphinx staring at me or 1,000 Elvis's luring me in with their wigs and their bellies.  As it was written once: "...after a while you learn to cope with things like seeing your dead grandmother crawling up your leg with a knife in her teeth" -HST




So, Farewell my fiends.. Please stay tuned...